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Bidhata Rai: Hum Jayega's Lil Princess
17 April 2008-Thursday
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-Detective Eye Candy
 
Bidhata Rai is a famous newsreader. Oooh….she has a British accent after all. And a face of Kantipur TV is bound to be famous. But did you know how popular her grandfather is? We bet you don't. Well, give us the opportunity to tell you then. You must have heard about the famous Darjeeling jokes featuring of course the very famous " Hum Jayega". The silliness, the weird comic essence the Hum Jayega jokes retain are the factors which make the jokes as popular even today. But what many might not be aware is of the fact that Hum Jayega is no fictional character but a one time eating breathing alive human. Yep, that's true. And from what we've
heard, Bidhata Rai the famous TV personality is the grand-daughter of the doubly, triply famous, the great Hum Jayega himself.
 
According to a site Humjayega.tk, the man a taxi driver got the name Hum Jayega which means "I will go" for his availability for any willing passengers 24/7. Even in the worst of weather, the toughest of roads, the highest of hills or in the poorest of the vehicle's conditions he would still agree on going anywhere to everywhere. The constant phrase popping out of his mouth was " I will go" or Hum Jayega and hence the name. (visit the site humjayega.tk or exploredarjeeling.com for more infos on the legend)
 
But the bottom line is, Hum Jayega is Bidatha Rai's grandfather, for real. Is that interesting or is that interesting? So hopefully behind that, posh clothes, serious persona and of course the "British accent" lies a descendent of one hilariously amusing man. Hmmm….only we wonder if she has the same knack for comic timings as much as her grandfather is famous for. After all, laughter should probably be running through her blood. We guess!!! 
 
Well, anyways, First of all "Booo… you retards" to all those of you who haven’t heard a Hum Jayega joke. But secondly, on a calmer note, we compiled a few selected Hum Jayega jokes,  Here is a glimpse of it, read on: 
 
When Hum Jayega met a Christian guy
Hum Jayega:
Bro, what is your name?
Stranger: John!
Hum Jayega: Oh! So you are a Christmas?!

Hum Jayega and his wife had a great desire to learn and speak English. Their typical conversation!
Hum Jayega: who built this Aloo Dum?
His wife: Oh! This is my composition.
 
 
One day Hum Jayega went to the doctor with both of his ears burnt. 
Doctor: So tell me how you burnt both of your ears?
Hum Jayega: I was ironing when the phone rang and I answered the iron by mistake.
Doctor: But how did you burn both of them?
Hum Jayega: Well, as soon as I put the iron down, the phone rang again. 
 
Hum Jayega goes to the doctor.

HUM JAYEGA walks into a doctor's office and tells the doctor he's broken every single bone in his body. "That's impossible!" says the doctor. HUM JAYEGA says, "No, it's really true. Look!" He then touches his leg with her index finger and screams "Ouch!" Then he touches his arm and yells "Eeeeoooow!" Finally he touches his ribs and can barely maintain his composure as the tears start to roll down his face. He says, "See, I told you I broke every bone in my body." The doctor rubs his chin, then conducts a thorough examination. "Well, Sir," he tells HUM JAYEGA, "I've got some good news and some bad news. The good news is, you haven't broken every bone in your body. The bad news is, you've broken your finger.
 

Hum Jayega's favorite flower.

Once  Hum Jayega and his two friends were sitting together. An Englishman came up and asked, hey guys, what is your favourite flowers? One of the Hum Jayega's friend replied ,'Lotus' 'Ha, I clean my shit with that!' the Englishman jeered The friend got angry.Another friend replied: 'Jasmine' 'Ha I clean my shit with that!' The Englishman response He also got angry. The Englishman asked Hum Jayega, 'And what is your favourite flower?' Hum Jayega replied: 'Cactus! Now clean your ass with that! "

 

Dad and Son.
Hum Jayega: Have you seen an ass?
Son: Yes, Dad!
Hum Jayega: How about an owl?
Son: That too Dad!
Hum Jayega: Yes, you look just like them.
Son: But dad, mum says I look exactly like you.

Test
Hum Jayega and a man were sitting outside a clinic. The man was crying like anything. So Hum Jayega asked, "Why are you crying?" The man replied, "I came here for blood test" Hum Jayega asked," So? Are you afraid?" The man replied, "No, not that. During the blood test they cut my finger" Hearing this Hum Jayega started crying. The man was astonished and asked Hum Jayega, "Why are you crying?" Hum Jayega replied, "I have come for my urine test."

Crocodile boots
Hum Jayega proposes to a woman. She says yes if you bring me a pair of crocodile boots. He sets off to Africa and disappears. Finally a search is being made, they find him hunting crocodiles and watch him killing a huge one. He walks over the reptile, checks its legs and angrily exclaims "71st and *again* barefoot!"

Where does God Live? 
Once the teacher was teaching moral science. He asked Hum Jayega's son," Kid do you know where god lives?"
Hum Jayega's son replied, "He lives in our bathroom."
Dismayed the teacher asked," What makes you say that?"
Student replied: "Because every morning my father bangs the bathroom door and shouts "Oh my god you are still there."
 
 
THE WAY WE WOULD LIKE TO TRANSLATE THEM :-

PROVERB:
KOSKO BAU LAY KE NAPCHA.

TRANSLATION:
WHOSE FATHER WHAT MEASUREMENT.

PROVERB:
KOSKO BAU KO KE SHAKTI.

TRANSLATION:
WHOSE FATHER WHAT VITAMIN.


PROVERB:
NACHNU JANDAI NA AGANA TERO.

TRANSLATION:
CAN'T DANCE VERANDAH DISBALANCE.

PROVERB:
JOON GORU KO SINGH CHAINA, TESKO NAAM TIKHE.

TRANSLATION:
WHICH BULL NO HORN, THAT BULL HORNY.

 
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